Can You Say No?
Updated: Jan 31
Ok this blog is written for a specific human but is going to be beneficial to all humans. You know who you are specific human.
You come first.
You are at the center of your world. No one else, not even your much-loved spouse/boyfriend/girlfriend or whatever else is “the center of your universe.” It’s you and only you. So, no matter what happens in life, it has to be in your best interest and of value to you.
You need to be able to bake yourself happier than anyone else can, because you really only have yourself forever. People come and go out of our lives, but you don't let your happiness come and go with them. You need to fill yourself up first. You cannot give to others, what you have not achieved yourself. If you don’t love yourself, you cannot deeply love others. If you are not happy, it is incredibly difficult to try and make others happy. If you don't even have an hour for yourself during the day, you cannot give away your time.
This all leads up to being able to say the word no. If someone asks you to do something for them and you don't have the time to, it’s ok to simply tell them no. Or if it's something that you really don’t want to do, you can say no. People pleasing is something that will deplete your energy quicker than almost anything, and if your cup isn't full you can't pour onto others. If you don't have enough energy for you, you don't have it to give away.
I say no all the time to people. I’ve even had friends ask me to hang out and I just tell them no, I don't want to today. I don't make excuses. I know I am not a mean person, and if they think I am being rude, then they should do some digging as to why they feel this way. It's not rude, I'm not lying, I’m not being mean, I’m just being honest. It has nothing to do with them personally. People want honesty, right? This goes both ways. If someone tells me no, I don't think they are mean or rude, I appreciate them being true to themselves.
Don't let people take advantage of you. If you are known as someone who always says yes, you may have to ease people out of them thinking you will do anything for them. There will always be times where no might not be the best option, even if there’s possible consequences.
Long story short, don't ever feel guilty about putting yourself before others. It's your life and your universe. We’re blessed to have our loved ones in it, but don't lose sight that you are at its center. The saying “the world doesn't revolve around you” is not true. It really does.